Girl Behaving Apprehensively

I'm at work right now and I don't know why but this morning, I was so nervous. A mixture of feelings swallowed me whole & I was forced to take an early lunch to go home, just for a bit. You're going to think I'm silly for telling you why but I'll tell you anyway.

Today, on the msg boards, some folks posted a couple of videos of Click being performed at the CD Listening Party and I wanted to see it. No one, and I mean NO ONE had seen it performed before by NKOTB and the folks at that party got to see it first hand. I wanted to see it so badly but I knew that song was not released yet and I was afraid they were going to ask that the youtubers take it down. I debated whether or not to take a long break from work or to just go during my lunch break.

I messaged the owner of one of the videos to send it to me due to my paranoia and she sent me the link but I still could not see it from work. (It's events like these that are compounding and contributing to my want & need to quit my job) I was paranoid because I am so anxious about seeing every little thing that it is affecting my work, my mentality, my writing, my behavior, my priorities, and my personality. Crazy. But I got to see it and my nausea went away, my headache stopped forming, and all is right in the world. lol!

If you compare my writing at the beginning of when I started this blog, you'll see how different it is. I just cannot seem to get back into that writing mode that I used to have. No regrets though, just an observation. I had a conversation last night with a friend. Maybe I'll start writing for a sex show. We'll see. Sex show? Well, I gotta get some inspiration, which will have to happen after the concerts. After all, New Kids on the Block concerts do have a reputation in the past for being "the most sexually charged" shows of all. Why do you think I wanna go so bad? ;)

Today reminds me of Tracy Peluso's NKOTB Hunt

Today was NKOTB's CD Listening Party!! One of the fans, Katie, got to go since she won a contest and she kept us all updated on what was going on. I'm excited to hear that they do read the responses to the blogs they put up on http://www.nkotb.com. Did I ever have any doubt? Of course not. Why wouldn't they want feedback? That's going to be a surefire way of knowing what the fans want! Those 5 geniuses have been running around in my mind all day long. Katie said that all the songs they played were uptempo and she liked Big Boy/Big Girl the most. I cannot wait to hear this album!! I've been waiting for it for soooooo long! Today, I pre-ordered 2 copies of the Deluxe version of The Block, their new album. It's a 2-disc album. So, now I have on pre-order, 2 copies of The Block, 2 copies of The Block Deluxe Version, and 2 copies of the Greatest Hits album...I think. I can't even keep track anymore!! Ah well, guess I'll just wait for my little surprises in the mail.

Katie also said that she got hugs from Joe and 2 kisses from Donnie. Wow. This time around, we relly have matured. I'm sure if this were to happen 20 years ago, whomever Donnie kissed would have been beaten up! Hahaha!! Can't believe the immaturity we went through back then. Of course, I was never a violent person, just have an ugly green monster called "jealousy" that would rear its head out every once in awhile. I spent all day waiting for updates on the party. Lately, my life is being consumed by this reunion and honestly, I couldn't be happier. I mean, yes, I'm still living my life, working, and I'm in the middle of a Bindlestiff production but at the same time, I feel like I'm living a double life: one that exists in the real world and one that thrives in the virtual world.

At night, I get suited up with my armor, ammunition, and rage and I go to youtube to the Summertime video from the user "universalmusicgroup" to fight my battles. The negative comments that catch my attention are the ones that hear my wrath. Of course, I am never mean, foul-mouthed, nor negative. I just tell them, plain & simple, that this reunion is for the fans and non-believers are not invited. Besides, what's the point of their negative commenting anyway? Who does that? Who goes out to look for a band they don't like, listen to a song they think sucks, and make the effort to come up with something impertinent to say?? Losers, that's who. I do this so often that I've had people come to my page and apologize to me! One person apologized to me twice!! I was pretty surprised I must say.

Anyway, next time you hear something dumb and you want to fight back, don't get to their low level and use foul language. Put them in their place with wit & candor. I often tell them to calm down because really, do they need to get so excited? No. No need at all. And if they get out of line, I will call them out. DO IT! You'll feel better! :)

Raised by New Kids on the Block

A fellow fan posted some videos on youtube that shot me back to 1989 and made me realize where the roots of my "cleanliness" derived from.

Donnie's interview with Jordan on Youthquake. Jordan's words ingrained into my head forever:
"New Kids say no to drugs, we stand against drugs and we want all of YOU to say no to drugs too and lead a drug free positive life."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=wm5VUtWN4xc

Joe & Danny being interviewed on ET. When asked what Joe's family taught him, I did the same:
"Be a nice person, be kind, that was the biggest thing that my mother & father always, to be positive, and just to live a good life, to try as hard as you can."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=Q1GmpMY6EtI

New Kids on the Block Hangin Out from Hangin Tough video. Donnie's voice: "We came here to do a job and that's to be good role models to every kid in the country and in the world...that's what we want to get across to the kids. We want them to know that it's cool to not do drugs and it's cool to not be in gangs and stuff and it's cool to just basically be yourself. Pretty much all we can hope for, just to create a better environment for the kids cuz they are the future..."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=5jY5UK0zHpE

Yes ladies & gentlemen. These videos are evidence of my so-called "cheesy" & "corny" roots. I was 13 years old and I was so "moldable." I needed someone to tell me that it's okay if I don't want to start smoking or doing drugs or whatever. I needed someone to make me feel like there was nothing wrong with me being me. I needed someone to make me feel loved all around when my family was falling apart at the seams.

I know I've said it before why New Kids are so important to me and that they were really the ones who raised me but to view the actual evidence of where the "parenting" came from was a very powerful moment for me. It made me think about all the kids today and how they don't have any band like this to tell them how wonderful they are if they could just be themselves. It made me cry just a little bit for the memory of all those harsh moments I had in junior high when NKOTB was considered "uncool" just because they were drug-free. It reminded me that I am a result of their positivity and I am proud to call myself a bonafide Blockhead!! :)

I pray to God that the younger generation of today get to witness at least SOME of the influential phenomena that went on 20 years ago. It's important to me that fans & non-fans alike understand that NKOTB are not here to prove something to anyone. They're just here to have fun, to reconnect with the fans, and to make some good music!! The next single is called "Dirty Dancing" and I heard it's got an incredible hook! I can't wait to hear it. Only 12 more weeks until I meet Donnie Wahlberg. I hope I will be able to lose some more weight!! :P

In 15 hours, I will be meeting some other NKOTB fans in my area and I'm very excited to be united with fellow Blockheads. Who knew that this mania would bring like-minded individuals together? I'm anxious to hear stories, share pictures, take pictures, and make new friends. We're all supposed to go in our New Kid gear in order to represent. I think I'll wear my NKOTB denim jacket. I love it to death though and I'm afraid it may get dirty. We'll see.

New Edition & New Kids on the Block UNITE!

Does anyone remember the New Edition reunion back in the day? I remember a little bit of it. I remember it was BIG! It was awesome! All six of them together again! I remember thinking, "Sigh...I wonder if New Kids on the Block will ever reunite." Well surprise surprise. Not only is New Kids on the Block reuniting, they recorded a song with New Edition!!! This was posted from people.com today.

My first thought was "HOLY SH*T!! This album is gonna HIT THE ROOF!!" I've been hearing haters say things like, "Sorry but New Edition was the original boyband. New Kids can never compare." Well, I cannot wait to see another one of those textbook comments on youtube so I can say "Sweetheart, if you love New Edition so much, then check out NKOTB's new album. They're ON IT!!" *Imaginary foul finger shoots up*

I don't like to fight but lately, my might NKOTB reinforced armor has been taking a lot of hits. One shot almost hit me in the heart. I just thank GOD that the New Kids are able to validate all my arguments. Without their incredible genius, I would never have been able to fire my NKOTB-edcuated missiles at these disrespectful & unnecessary remarks. Thank you NKOTB, for being you, for loving us, and for giving both of us (you and the fans) the chance to reminisce, to reconnect, and to recollect. See you guys in October.

Peace, Love & Hang Tough